I've got to get this off my chest: Since when do rhinoplasty and breast augmentation automatically go hand in hand?
I love a good transformation, but the ABC reality series "Extreme Makeover" has given new meaning to the phrase boob tube. The show -- ostensibly meant to fix applicants' crooked noses or chipped teeth -- always ends up giving female participants more than they bargained for.
It seems that no matter the original insecurity, every woman ends up receiving veneers, liposuction and a considerable breast augmentation. Don't like the shape of your lips? Perhaps changing from a B cup to a whopping DD will make it all better.
I can only imagine going to a cosmetic dentist and having him say at the end, 'Your teeth look great now, but you know what would really make you sparkle ... ?" Ick.
Speaking of reality TV shows, Fox's reality series "The Swan" may have hit a new low. Even for Fox, the network that brought you "My Big Fat Obnoxious Fiancé" and "The Littlest Groom."
I'm sure producers have for years been looking to combine plastic surgery and pageantry and -- by goodness -- they've finally done it.
The Monday night show transforms women from "ugly ducklings" into beautiful, well-rounded television spokesmodels. Some will go on to compete in the first annual Swan Pageant. According to the show's Web site, "Each week, feathers will fly as the inevitable pecking order emerges."
Nothing says hen-pecking like a good reality TV pageant. But I think forcing women to appear on camera drugged, swollen and bandaged as they recover from plastic surgery AND THEN, AND THEN, force them to twirl a baton or juggle monkeys to win a tiara is simply too much public humiliation.
I'll enjoy my veneers and boob job in private, thank you very much.
-- Elyssa Andrus
This article appeared in the Daily Herald on April 14, 2004 on B1.
http://www.heraldextra.com/content/view/95645/149/
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